I Escaped My Postpartum Depression

amelias bed hairIf you have ever had postpartum depression after having a baby then you have more than likely had at LEAST one person try and cheer you up the wrong way or just plain out say something that is completely uncalled for. When I had my first child, my daughter Amelia back in 2013, I loved her with all my heart but hit a roadblock about 3 months in.

PPD can show it’s ugly face in so many ways you guys. I’m just going to give you my personal experience of it. Three months after having her I started getting what other people would call lazy. Then I got to where I just had absolutely no motivation to do anything. The only thing I wanted to do was eat, watch tv, and sleep. I did not however lose motivation to take care of my baby thank the good Lord. I never neglected her once throughout the entire thing. But I neglected my house and myself. I even neglected my husband. I remember sitting in my bedroom with the tv off just crying for hours all day long because I felt worthless and I felt like nobody cared about me. This might sound like a pity party to you or a bit over dramatic but this is what PPD will do to you. A major imbalance of hormones.

This lasted for 3 years, guys. I don’t think it normally lasts that long but I also didn’t get any medication for it because at the time I didn’t realize that it was PPD. I just thought I was a horrible mom and wife. I got so reserved to myself that I actually got mad when visitors would show up at my house unexpectedly.

My depression spiraled out of control so badly that there were dirty diapers laying on my living room floor, there were dishes getting moldy in the kitchen, there were dirty rings in my toilet! Family members stopped coming over after seeing the condition that my house was in because is grossed them out. This deep depression lasted about a year before I started getting a little bit better. Slowly, my mindset kept progressing and now I believe I am a completely different person.

Ladies, I don’t know alot about PPD but I do know that it can come in many different forms. If you feel like this at all after just having your precious baby then please, go see a doctor. It only gets way worse before it gets better. It is really hard and embarrassing sharing this story with everyone on here for the world to see and read but I believe my story needs to be heard…

Chaotic Mornings And Loving It

Hey everyone thank you so much for reading my blog because this is my very first one. I’ve NEVER done this before and I really appreciate your support. So, to kick things off I am just going to go over what is going on in my life on a daily basis and see if anyone can relate especially these moms out here that are just exhausted. Whether it be physically or mentally or both. I know us moms need a great support system and I think if we can band together and vent to each other then it might just make our day a little bit better or even just bearable.

Let’s start with day 1 of my exhausted mom life blogs! Today I woke up at 9:00 this morning to my 7 month old son cooing and playing with his toys in his crib beside our bed. I thought “Oh, ok, maybe since he is happy and content I can catch about 30 more minutes of sleep.” NOPE!! My 3 year old son and 5 year old daughter are quietly laughing trying to be sneaky in their playroom right next to mine but I know what is REALLY going on in the back of my mind. “Oh dear goodness, they are up and torturing my yorkie in his cage by poking him and pushing stuff through his crate and the poor thing is probably so scared he is about to whiz himself, I’d better get up!”

Of course as soon as I get up though my kids start yelling at me “Mommy, I want cereal.” “Mommy, I’m hungry.” “Mommy, can I have a peanut butter jelly sandwich?” About the time I open my mouth to tell them “Just a minute!” my baby starts wailing for food and all 3 dogs start whining and barking. So, here we are at 9:00 in the morning, Just woke up, one eye open, a bad taste in my mouth and CHAOS!!!! SOMEONE TELL ME THIS GETS BETTER AS THEY GET OLDER!!! I’m going to take a wild guess and say no it won’t. After breakfast all I hear is fighting, barking, crying, and my husband yelling “Honey, where are my shoes?!”

But you know what, guys? I love it all. 🙂

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I would rather be here dealing with all of this chaos than be alone and not having any of it. My babies are my world and so is my husband. In between all of the fighting and screaming comes the hugs, I love you’s, smiles, laughs, jokes, and overwhelming love. So I can’t help but be so thankful for EVERYTHING that I have. They are my world.

Leave some comments below and tell me when your chaos begins everyday lets trade stories!! 😀

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